Monday, August 24, 2015

When you don't want to "Adult"

In the completely annoying generational,1,000 selfies a day, granny hipster talk ;

I can't even.

In my (very short) experience as a military wife, I've come to the conclusion I'm not the ONLY wife that ::hates:: driving in traffic. I'm not the ONLY one that doesn't have a car, so I have to wait for the Soldier man to get home to get anything done.

Civilian wives jump in this boat too... Cause there is plenty of room. Let me tell ya. 

Then there comes a day when we emerge from our homes, toddlers in tow, hoping we don't run into people we know, and we drop our hubbies off at work...... And run . Errands.

Take a deep breath. You're gonna need it. 

Grocery store 9:00 am. 

You're cruising there, from the husbands work. Tunes blasting, windows down. Deep breath. If you get done before lunch the only ones in the grocery are tired moms wearing the same yoga pants as you, and her kid is on her phone watching Thomas Train on YouTube just like yours.

We both reach for the dried fruit pouches with Mickey on them.... Because our kids are two. And, all things Mickey must happen.

We smile knowingly at our chopped off locks, in need of styling, and air dried by our rolled down windows.

My mossy oak ball cap hides my roots and dry skin forehead.

We continue. 

Grocery cart full, and most likely over budget. 

I see a sale on a jumbo size of coconut flour. Bingo! 

Call my friend. "You want some"? Yes? Oh? And a play date/ sleep over? Sure! 

Mentally scrub bathrooms. That counts right?

Home. Toddler wants my lunch, not his. Oops! There are peanuts in my gluten free pad Thai. 

I spring into action and take away the noodles. Thank God he isn't severely allergic. But little blisters happen on the mouth, and he starts to fuss. 

Forget this. We skip the lunch and go to desert of cuddles, ginger snaps and cold apple cider. The blisters disappear and I start to breath normal.

But I'm still hungry so Veggie Tales happen with I put havarti on plain Jane crackers. Sprinkle cracked black pepper, garlic, and dill.

Best pick me up.

Now maybe I should go to the dentist and clean my home before the sleep over happens.
Tomorrow, lovelies 😜

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